Story Excerpts

Three Sisters: A Novel©September 18, 2016

By Author, Lydia Nolan

She was the eldest of the three of us and now she was gone. I had no one left who cared about me. My other sister never was there for anyone. My big sister was my last earthly foundation; she was like a mother to me. There was a void in me beyond despair and I felt sure my heart would burst in agony. Everyone in my family was gone and I wanted to be gone, too.

It was no coincidence that I began to feel ill. Nearly every day I would awake, unable to pull myself out of bed without some pain somewhere in my body. It was Fibromyalgia, the doctor said, meaning: when they did not know what else it was, it had to be a nerve issue.

Funny, my mother always said to me as a child: “you are such a nervous child, why are you so nervous, why can’t you be calm like your sister?” She meant the sister in the middle; the one who loved her friends but not her sisters as much. Or she would say, “I can always tell your mood, you show everything on your face, especially when you’re mad.” She criticized me quite a lot.

I wish she could have mentioned the happy spirit that people noticed in me as I was out and about in the world: “you are such a happy girl, dear.” Or, “you have the most contagious laugh,” or “you are always smiling, you have such a wonderful disposition.”

I suppose my mother always saw me ‘sad’ because she had sad eyes reflected from her soul. She was sad and sick all of the time.

 

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“Because you loved him,”

Dr. Wilkes shot through my private narrative, and I realized what I was saying and where I was.

“The betrayal of Lieutenant Mathis,” she continued, “gave you pause and made your inner conscience begin to suspect him as the killer himself–is that where your distrust of Daniel began? …”

I never even heard her wake me up or how I woke up, but I was now sitting up on the couch where I lay hypnotized earlier.

“Taos: a novel”

© by Lydia Nolan

September 9, 2012