Often I awake feeling numb as a sheet of paper awaiting its creator for form, content–just anything. But its context first, or is it content first? Now is my time to wet the sheet with words; instructions and inhalation’s of my surroundings, as evidence of life yesterday and the day before–and today of course.
I know I’m here because I sense I am alive. I am breathing, though much more shallow in the morning when I first rise. But I look around as though I am trying to put together what I am here for.
“How did I get here? And where am I? Who is that man next to me, oh yeah…”
So I sit at the edge of the bed, listless and ill-removed from enthusiasm and elation; at least not yet. Give me a chance to start the coffee. Once coffee is made, I have to take out the dogs. Once that’s accomplished I have to feed the dogs and cat. Once THAT is accomplished I am beginning to feel alive, get my coffee and come over to the tech-box and spout my thoughts. Best activity to wake me up is to warm up a cold brain with words on the screen to prove I am thinking.
I have to turn on the burners of my consciousness. I have to remember what day it is and what I had planned yesterday for today. It takes me longer now in my older age than it did when I was younger. But I can still do it, and as long as I can still do it, I will do it! So then, how to warm up a cold brain? Just like your car; start it up, let it rev a bit, then put it in drive and make your way out to the highway. Do not park in the freeway, do not stop when it’s “go.” But move with the other vehicles in brain-land, take your place among the living and keep going until your car (brain) breaks down and dies.
When I was younger I was like a bullet. I’d wake up talking! I’d run to the nearest open closet, gather up my day’s wares, jump into the shower, go to work. I’d grab a cup of coffee there at the office kitchen and attend immediately to my desk and its loads of cases for various kinds of implementations. Okay, so I am slower–so what. I can still do all those things, but now I do it as though I am a model and a diva: slow and sexy. Yes, you heard me right. You have to play with your brain sometimes, make it believe what you tell it, and how do y ou tell it? Why your Will, of course. It’s the will that is the fire under the brain, so start exercising it.
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